‘When I toss pebbles in a puddle, she throws boulders in the ocean!’
I say I visited Rome.
She says, ‘I met with the Pope.’
I say…we stayed in Florence…near Rialto Bridge.
She says, I stayed in a villa with a chef, housekeeper, views across the Tuscan hills.
I ask, ‘What do you know of the Renaissance?’
‘Nothing,’ she says.
Next day I ask, ‘What was your villa like?’
‘Painted ceilings, fireplaces, gardens, vineyards.’
I say, my apartment…and describe Pitti Palace and all its beauty.
She’s stumped. She’s embarrassed. She sits, fiddles.
I have finally won, but the win is hollow.
There is no joy in defeating a braggart on braggart terms.